Love Questing At Salem Mall
• I’m at the Salem Mall now.
• As usual, I feel paralyzed and can’t approach anyone.
• If they talk first though, the paralysis is healed instantly.
• The smaller the amount of encouragement, the greater the paralysis is.
• The more preoccupied they are – such as in a fast walk in the opposite direction – the more paralyzed I get.
• A goddess is standing not 15 feet away.
• Why don’t I just go up and start talking?
• I just gave her a grin while she was looking right at me.
• I got only a stone-faced response in return.
• Sometimes I feel fear, but other times, lack of desire forms the restraining hand.
• There’s an aversion to expressing lustful desire.
• Oops. She just walked away and caught me staring.
• I fear being too obvious.
• Yet this is a problem and hindrance to the development of healthy, communicative romances.
• Folks don’t say what’s on their minds and agendas.
• I’m generally bored with pointless chatter whether from me or from another person.
• I’m not motivated to initiate conversation with the unattractive.
• Now keep in mind that _attraction_ comes in many different varieties and if they approach me with a smiling personality, I’d _become_ interested in conversation.
• But if the lady has no redeeming physical or obvious personality traits at a glance, then I wish not to speak to her.
• An older woman just smiled at me.
• I got a rush of energy.
• This dull tense ache in my stomach abated and ebbed a little.
• Encouragement even if it comes from a non eligible person supplies some fortitude.
• How can I give myself this internal push?
• How can I provide an effective source of nurturing, fear-reducing encouragement?
• A girl with her boyfriend. She’s not approachable thus. And I have no desire to do so.
• Repeating to myself that the attractive women are human just like me. Causes some calming.
• The more I want ‘em, the more I fear ‘em.
• The less I want ‘em, the less I fear ‘em.
• And the less likely I am to approach ‘em since the inclination isn’t there.
• What is it?
• What is it?
• What is it?
• What is it?
• Perhaps talking to many happy couples would provide some insights.
• Perhaps chatting with loners could help also.
• Realize that love rejection is normal, and to be expected.
• I just talked to a casher in the Babbage’s store. Friendly but short. Sexy but cool.
• The more reason I have to approach besides wanting to date them, the less fear there is.
• Getting familiar with most store goods at malls helps when I want to start a conversation in them.
• I’m riding the waves of the force.
• Cashers are easier to talk to than a mall shopper the store in which they work offers an easy lead in.
• Easier to approach if they look at me, and easier still if they smile.
• I bought Girl Scout cookies from an assertive woman helping her daughter sell.
• But as she handed me the change, her wedding band glinted in the mall lights.
• Shucks!
