Dear Lauren,
Yes [...]. I agree. Exchanging phone numbers makes the getting-acquainted process much more pleasurable. My number is 814-742-xxxx. I’m in and out all the time. Just keep trying until you get me.
I’m working on writing a book to help people connect more easily with those they find very attractive. Perhaps you can give me some female perspective on this topic sometime.
Anyway, I have to get to work. Take care. Perhaps we’ll talk soon.
Dear Lauren,
I understand, about you’re not wanting to post your real pic [...]. I’m not mad about the decoy.
Go ahead and send the real pics to this address:
Thomas.hesley@xxxxx.yyy.
Perhaps I could cheer you up. We’ll just have to see how it goes.
Later,
Tom Hesley
No problem. I appreciate your feedback.
No, I do not want children. But some ladies who say they want them, are willing to entertain a relationship with guys who do not share this aspiration immediately. Perhaps this is true because we never really know, when reading the ads just HOW important children are when someone says that they want them. Some say they want them just because it’s traditional for them to have maternal inclinations. Yet they’re not terribly passionate about children. So with you, I wanted to find out if you might be someone willing to forego children if you found enough other attractive things about me to overcome that difference.
But apparently, children are very important to you, above all else that we might have in common. So noted.
Then, there’s also the question of timing. Many women, particularly the very young (early twenties) say they want children, but not right away. These people are often wiling to date people for ten to fifteen years before they want to get down to brass tacks. By writing you, I just wanted to learn the extent of your particular child-rearing passions.
Oh, and on the part of my ad where I talk about meeting “ladies”, perhaps I should rewrite that to say that I’d like to meet many first, but eventually end up with one very special one as my lover. This is what I meant to convey. I don’t want to put all my emotional eggs in one lady’s basket until I’m reasonably certain that she would not abuse this honor once I give the basket to her. So until I meet “the one” I would like to meet lots of prospective ones. No, I do not have sex with multiple partners, and certainly not quickly.
Anyway, take care, and it shouldn’t be too long before you find someone who shares your values and aspirations, that you find attractive too.
[This lady felt that we didn't have enough in common. In fact, she was confused as to why I even contacted her. People just don't want to go outside their comfort zones, do they.]
Well, I thought we shared quite a bit in common. Not EVERYTHING of course. But quite a bit. No matter though. Good luck to you too.
[Another rejection due to long distance.]
No problem. Good luck in your search.
Dear [Tad],
I heard back from [Elstan]. She said my invitation sounded like it would be fun but that she was gong to be out of town on a canoeing trip. Darn. Perhaps next time.
Anyway, I’m not going to come this weekend because I really can’t take off work this afternoon to ride out there. Things are quite hectic at the moment. So let’s shoot for the next meeting and see where things fall.
Thanks for your help.
Talk to you soon,
Tom Hesley
[This one was put off by my insistence on seeing her pictures early on.]
Well, definitely opposing views here. But now you have me really curious as to what you look like. I assure you that I don’t go for that one-night-stand stuff, and am ultimately interested in one-on-one, monogamous relationships with ladies who I find physically attractive, AND mentally intriguing, caring, thoughtful, and confident. So, even if you look like Miss America, that alone will not get you a “quickie” from me. Besides, I haven’t found the last five Miss Americas all that attractive anyhow.
Not to say that the “inner” stuff is not important, mind you. It certainly is. Both the physical attraction (presumably based on external appearance), and how the lady treats me (presumably based on her mental or inner “mind” qualities) are equally important to the success of the relationship. In my opinion, you can’t have one without the other and expect to sustain a healthy romance over the long term. Thus, I don’t like to spend too much time talking to someone, sight unseen.
So hey, let me see your pics. I promise I won’t hit you up for quick sex. Also, it seems like we could have a healthy debate on this issue that would really help me out. I’m writing a book that deals with these very issues. Thoughts?
[This lady declined my get-acquainted request due to the long physical distance between us.]
No problem. Good luck to you in your search.
Dear [Elstan],
No problem. It was late notice I gave you. Enjoy your canoe trip. Seems like you should be quite the canoeing expert, as you’ve been doing this for a couple years now.
How old is your daughter? Near 30? Did you just have one child, or more? Yes, I believe you mentioned going to Cape Cod when we last chatted in person in April, 2001.
I’ll say “Hi” for you to the board, if I come. Still working out the details. It was sort of late notice for me as well.
Well, I’ll check with you the next time I’m thinking about coming there.
Talk to you later,
Tom Hesley
Dear Onyx,
Hi.
Sounds like you’ve been quite busy career wise. A couple of my sisters are involved in the health care profession as well.
I am the oldest and only male in a family of five. I got my degree in computer science with a minor in mathematics from the University of Pittsburgh (main campus) in 1988, and have been with my current employer since then.
I’m writing my first book and if it does well, I’ll become a full-time author.
I like the old-style video games. The new ones seem too busy – too many things going on on the screen at the same time. But I really haven’t played with them much. Perhaps if I did, this wouldn’t be an issue.
I do not smoke and rarely drink (perhaps three to five times a year).
By the way, do you have a pic of yourself you could email me? I’d like to get an idea of who you look like. 
Well, I have to go work in the yard for a bit before the daylight goes away. Take care, and write soon.
Tom Hesley
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