Comments on: Will BT Write Me? http://TomsLoveQuest.com/2009/10/16/will-bt-write-me/ Tom Hesley's Account of his Search for True Love Thu, 29 Jul 2010 15:44:24 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: Tom Hesley http://TomsLoveQuest.com/2009/10/16/will-bt-write-me/comment-page-1/#comment-99 Tom Hesley Mon, 25 Jan 2010 17:18:45 +0000 http://TomsLoveQuest.com/?p=2114#comment-99 I talked with [BJ] this morning. She did in fact, forward the above letter to [BT], and she did confirm with [BT] that she received it. But that's been some months ago now. So it's likely a fair assumption that [BT] isn't going to write. Apparently, [BT] understood my motives, because [BJ] did say, without my asking that [BT] still has a boyfriend; although they’re not living together anymore. [BT] said that she may write back. But [BJ] felt that she’d only do so if she thought that all I wanted was friendship. [BJ] warmed that [BT] would definitely not respond, if she sensed that I wanted to develop anything more than a strictly non-romantic association. At any rate, [BT] now has my email address, and since I now know that she knows that I’m interested in communicating, I need wonder no more why she keeps silent. I’ve often pondered that question through the years: Is it that she just doesn’t know I’m interested? Maybe she’s of the old school and doesn’t initiate communications, believing that it’s up to the guy to do it. Or, might it just be that though she knows I’m interested, she has no similar interest in me? However, I need not know the precise reason why she’s been so quiet, because all that really matters is that [BT] has chosen not to communicate, though I’ve made doing so as easy for her as I can. I’ve given her the means to reach me, and ample encouragement to do that if she so desires. So, regardless of the reason she hasn’t done it so far, it must be good enough for me to know that she just doesn’t want to. In fact, I have now pursued this effort to its logical conclusion, because there’s nothing more that I should (or can) do, without [BT] rightly perceiving me as a disrespectful pest. But, should she change her mind, I’ll probably be here. She knows I like her, and she’s assertive enough that I believe that she will get in touch with me should she ever develop similar feelings. So, I must now leave it up to her to take the next step, and I’m comfortable knowing that she’ll probably never take it. Unless new information comes in that strongly indicates that she has changed her mind, I’d be a fool to make any further overtures, and my conscience (through the voice of anxiety and fear) would not permit me to take any further action. I talked with [BJ] this morning. She did in fact, forward the above letter to [BT], and she did confirm with [BT] that she received it. But that’s been some months ago now. So it’s likely a fair assumption that [BT] isn’t going to write.

Apparently, [BT] understood my motives, because [BJ] did say, without my asking that [BT] still has a boyfriend; although they’re not living together anymore. [BT] said that she may write back. But [BJ] felt that she’d only do so if she thought that all I wanted was friendship. [BJ] warmed that [BT] would definitely not respond, if she sensed that I wanted to develop anything more than a strictly non-romantic association.

At any rate, [BT] now has my email address, and since I now know that she knows that I’m interested in communicating, I need wonder no more why she keeps silent. I’ve often pondered that question through the years: Is it that she just doesn’t know I’m interested? Maybe she’s of the old school and doesn’t initiate communications, believing that it’s up to the guy to do it. Or, might it just be that though she knows I’m interested, she has no similar interest in me?

However, I need not know the precise reason why she’s been so quiet, because all that really matters is that [BT] has chosen not to communicate, though I’ve made doing so as easy for her as I can. I’ve given her the means to reach me, and ample encouragement to do that if she so desires. So, regardless of the reason she hasn’t done it so far, it must be good enough for me to know that she just doesn’t want to. In fact, I have now pursued this effort to its logical conclusion, because there’s nothing more that I should (or can) do, without [BT] rightly perceiving me as a disrespectful pest.

But, should she change her mind, I’ll probably be here. She knows I like her, and she’s assertive enough that I believe that she will get in touch with me should she ever develop similar feelings. So, I must now leave it up to her to take the next step, and I’m comfortable knowing that she’ll probably never take it. Unless new information comes in that strongly indicates that she has changed her mind, I’d be a fool to make any further overtures, and my conscience (through the voice of anxiety and fear) would not permit me to take any further action.

]]>